The Purpose of Marriage            

" No Man without a wife, neither a woman without a husband, not both of them without G'D "

                         ๐Ÿ”น๏ธ Bereishis Rabbah 8:9 ๐Ÿ”น๏ธ

This also reflected in a Jewish Chasene Ceremony, this by law and tradition and to establishes a new family. When we are going to marry someone, we must know what we are trying to find in a future husband or wife, as we all know in a Shidduch what a Shadchan is looking for, more importantly as we don't always know the one we are going to marry, that we don't know  what the physical and the emotional maturity is, let alone that one we marry is psychologically ready. Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea  to consider the nature of family life and the relationship between husband and wife to take into the Kallah and Chossen lessons.

As the Torah doesn't provide us with not much guidance on the procedures of a marriage, how we do find a husband or wife and how to form a Chasene Ceremony , the explaination we can find in the Talmud.

๐Ÿ”น๏ธIn martiage women has to observe a number of ritual regulations within the domestic household, this inclueded preparations and serving food according to the Kashrut, the Rabbinic dietary laws.

๐Ÿ”น๏ธAlso observe of limiting on marital intimacy during the period of Niddah.

๐Ÿ”น๏ธ To separate and burn a piece of dough in making Challah for Shabbos, the reminder the Temple sacrifice and to light the Shabbos Hadlagah.

Performing these rituals gives women a spiritial of sanctification in every day life.

The most beautiful part of the wedding is the Kiddushin, during which the woman is engaged to the husband to be, and when he is places the ring on her finger and says :

Harei at m'kudeshet li, b'taba'at zo, k'dat Moshe v' Yisrael.

Be sanctified to me with this ring in according to the law of Moshe and Israel.

A marriage is sacred and should bring us Love, Happiness and a Soulmate โค

 

          Family Life, the key to Happiness

When a home of a family with strong Jewish values, stable and healthy, the all of Jewish life whether in relationship to HaShem, our social life, and in education, it will be full of life, vibrant and filled with happiness.

When a home is emotionally weak, spirtually and morally, all else will soon mirror that weakness.

Our religious laws are a big part of family life and  also in Jewish Religious codes, these codes cover every aspect of family life, from our appearances to our most intimate relationships

๐Ÿ”น๏ธRespect for the integrity, and feelings of All members of the family as humanbeings.

๐Ÿ”น๏ธTo develope and maintain a peaceful and harmonious relationship with All members of the family ( Shalom Bayit ).

๐Ÿ”น๏ธTo maintain a spiritual purity and a healthy attitude in marital relationship between husband and wife.

๐Ÿ”น๏ธThere must be recognition and acceptance of different roles of each member of the family.

Happiness of family life begins with having respect, acceptance, understanding, patience, warmth and  education.

The central role of a Jewish home is a sactuary, where values children to grow, to florish, a place to feel safe and secure. Yiddishkeit is meant to be joy, pleasant and when we bring our children up.with these values, it will show.

The greatest gift we could give our children is a happy home. 

The Torah gives us advice how we can put this into reality.

 

 

The essence of a great marriage from Jewish perspective

The most important thing for a good marriage is that of a Jewish home that is built on the foundation of Torah and mitzvos. There is no better way for the Jewish people having wisdom and conviction after thousands years of experience since Matan Torah.

 

It is Torah that lights up our path and feeling the security in terms of love and well- being in materially and spirituality. 

 

Torah teaches us how to behave, love you fellow Jew, the essence of Torah, which focus on the soul rather than the body and that alone is the essence of a great marriage.

 

When you marry your partner, how do you expect him or her to treat you? What was the most important thing which is absolutely necessary to agree to marry him or her?

 

We all think that marrying out of love only is what we need to do make a marriage a succes. Nothing could be further from the truth. What if after some months or even after years and the love once felt gradually disapears? The foundation of your marriage is completely gone, that even marriage counseling wouldn't work as there is nothing left other than a written Get and a divorce which will follow. When love has left the marriage, what else binds the relationship? 

 

What our job is after we leave the Chuppah is to make you husband or wife feel loved, respected, understood, valued and needed. This can only be achieved by making you husband or wife number one in your life, not yourself.

 

From Jewish perspective we don't need emotional fulfillment, but rather make spirituality our priority, we then focus more on what really matters and give your partner your whole heart. It doesn't mean you have to agree on everything what your partner wants, it means that what your partner wants is more important than what you want.

 

Living accourding to Torah means we value spirituality over the physical. A great marriage values this in a relationship and when you make your partner number one, this is the same as " loving your fellow Jew."  The need and well- being of the other one should always becomes before yours.

 

In a marriage you should never devalue your husband or wife, a marriage is a relationship in which we should never abandon commitment. Not to get angry or argue or criticize your partner. The Talmud compares anger to idol -  worship and worship of self, not HaShem.

 

Don't deny what your partner wants or needs. In a marriage we have to behave respectfully towards each other, with kindness, make your husband or your wife feel that they are the most important person in your life.

The importance of a Happy Family