I’m going to tell you why it’s never appropriate to hold on to regrets…

There’s a saying of our sages that goes “the wicked are full of regrets”.

Now I’m not calling you wicked…

But if you regret something, and keep repeating the same mistake anyways…

That means the regret didn't change anything.

So if you're “full of regrets” it means you're not learning from your mistakes.

You’re not growing…

But even more than that—

It’s not acceptable to live with regrets…

It’s not correct to regret what could have been…

To think that things would be different today…

If only you’d known more back then or made different decisions…

Then your life would be different.

No.

Dwelling on what could have been is simply not kosher.

That kind of thinking only keeps you from seeing your present opportunities…

Which means you're not letting yourself live…

Because what your life is right now—is exactly how it’s meant to be.

But here’s what’s not obvious…

Whether you make a good choice or a bad one…

The consequences are always independent of your choice.

And that's why you can choose to do the right thing and fail

Or you can choose the wrong thing and succeed

Because whether you fail or succeed—it’s G-d's plan.

What matters is that you made the right choice or learned from the wrong one.

And of course, you get credit for making the right choice…

(and you're held responsible for making a bad choice)

But that's where your freedom of choice ends…

Your life today is exactly what it's supposed to be, regardless of your past choices.

So, let go of those "if only" regrets.

They don't belong in your life.

Because whether it came through your positive choices… negative choices… or no choices…

The life you have is the life G-d gives you.

And if G-d is giving you this life…

That means this is the best life.

The only life that you’re meant to fix.

So, roll up your sleeves and get to work…

Nothing went wrong—this is your challenge.

Rabbi Manis Friedman